Chapter 86 – Pleasing the Boss

Receiving praise from the man gives the oddest hit of dopamine. It’s unsustainable, and barely pleasurable, but it sure makes me crave more. I read once that humans aren’t programmed to be happy; that instead they’re programmed for survival.

My annoying-ass lizard brain must think praise from Samuel Seymour must be necessary for my survival because I want to hear it again as much as I want to have Brystin back in my arms.

By the time the text comes through from the driver five minutes later, I have a surefire plan to get both.

Brystin POV

“Is it me? Do I have a big sign on my forehead that says, ‘easily used’? Am I just a big fat s**ker for toxic men who love their careers more than people?”

Shiloh strokes my hair as we lie in her bed, my head in her lap, which has been surprisingly soothing. I was a big snotty mess when I arrived at her door, and now the only signs of my tearfest are swollen eyes and an occasional hiccup.

“Of course it’s not you,” she says, which is a lie.

“I’m already in a bad place, Shiloh. Just give it to me straight.”

Her hand pauses mid-stroke, and I swear I can hear her thinking.

I turn my head so I can peer up at her face. “You’re taking too long to answer. Is it that bad? It’s that bad, isn’t it? I’m hopeless.”

“You’re not hopeless. You’re big-hearted. Does that make you a target? Maybe. Do I think you’re doomed to a life of toxic relationsh*ps?” She tilts her head back and forth as she considers. “I might have had a different answer a couple of weeks before. But after hearing what went down with Elvis, it sounds like you’ve finally grown some balls.”

I sit up. “I really did feel like a badass.”

“Obviously.”

“I think it was the first time I’ve ever left an argument with him without feeling whittled down.”

“See? It’s a massive step forward.” She gives me a cautious smile. “As for Hadrian, I’m not so sure I’m ready to lump him in the same category of toxicity.”

At the sound of his name, I have to twist my l*ps in order to stem any new tears. Officially telling my husband I’m leaving him has my feelings all in a knot, but the true source of my heartache right at the moment is Hadrian.

I try to access the same strength I found in the confrontation with Elvis. “It’s a big red flag, though.”

“Sure it is. He played you, and that’s gross as all get out. But I’ve seen you together. He’s into you. He’s into you in a way that asshat never was, and I think that should count for something.”

“So you think I should just forgive him?”

“No. No. That’s setting a precedent that you don’t want to set. But maybe wait and see what happens next. Make him work for you. Make him grovel.” She considers for a beat. “Yeah, make him really grovel. Make him get that big fat billionaire checkbook out and buy you stuff.”

I laugh for the first time since I arrived, and it feels foreign, like I haven’t laughed in ages, even though my stomach still hurts from all the giggling I did last night.

Or maybe it hurts from the sex.

Whichever, it’s a reminder of how recently I was happy, and how quickly my world turned upside down.

Shiloh latches on to my amusement and attempts to draw it out. “He can buy me stuff, too.”

“You? Why do you deserve anything?” I t**se.

She doesn’t have a chance to answer before a knock sounds from the front door. We exchange glances. Shiloh doesn’t have a doorman, but there’s an intercom system, and visitors have to be buzzed in.

“It’s probably Ashish.” She stands, talking to me as she walks out of the bedroom. “He’s been popping over lately, every time he gets a fill up on his weed.”

“Shiloh, do not tell me you’re leading that boy on just so you can get drugs.” Her neighbor has an obvious crush on her.

She pops her head back in the room. “Not just drugs. I’m using him for sex too.” With that bomb drop, she disappears to address the visitor, as another round of knocks starts, more insistent this time.

I collapse back on the bed with a sigh, knowing I need to start thinking about what I want to do with Hadrian for real. It’s not like I can put it off since I work with him. It’s possible he’s already tried calling me, but I’ve turned my phone off, mostly because I don’t want to have to deal with Elvis.

And f**k, I have to deal with him too. I need to meet with a lawyer, make some preliminary separation arrange—

My thoughts stop cold when one of the voices outside the bedroom registers as Hadrian’s.

I sit up, propping myself on my elbows just as Shiloh appears in the doorframe. “Apparently, he gave someone a hundred dollars to let him in,” she explains. “That computer techie with the dog, I bet. I told him if he wanted to see you, he should be paying me.”

She holds up a stack of bills and fans them out, all Benjamin Franklins.

“You ratted me out for a thousand bucks?” It’s play mad, though, because my insides went to mush as soon as I heard his voice, and I’m working very hard not to bolt out of the room in search of him.

“I would have paid more.” Hadrian peers over Shiloh’s five-foot-two frame, and dammit, the man is my kryptonite. I’m not even standing, and I’m weak in the knees.

Shiloh puts her hand on her hip in not-so-mock rage. “You can’t tell me that after we’ve already bargained.”

“I actually can, and I just did.” Before she puts up more of a fuss, he reaches in his pocket and pulls out another few bills. “But you can have these as well, if you’ll give us the room for a bit.”

She snatches the cash from his hand, then looks at me. “Up to you, B.” To Hadrian, she adds, “I’m keeping the money no matter what she says, btw.”

My head is warning me to be cautious, but everything it’s saying is in vain. I’m helpless to my heart, and my heart is a magnet, and Hadrian is iron pulling me to him. I’m already standing when I answer. “It’s fine.”

At the same time, Hadrian says, “She’s okay with it.”

Dammit, why is his attempt to answer for me so maddening and heart melting at the same time?

“All righty, then.” Shiloh backs out of the way so he can come in. “Don’t break anything.”

When he’s stepped past her, she mouths in my direction that I’m guessing is something like make him grovel, based on the accompanying hand gesture of hands clasped together and the pleading look on her face.

I respond with an exp**ssion that says get the f**k out of here, ho.

Then she’s gone, the door is shut, and it’s just the two of us.

I take a step toward him. “How did you find me? Did Shiloh text you behind my back?”

“Had you followed.” He takes a step toward me.

“Sounds right.” At least, he was honest.

Next thing I know, my mouth is on his, and his hand is down my shorts. His shorts, because of course I’m still wearing his clothes, and oh my God, he really learned how to get me there last night, because I’m already halfway to an orgasm.

“f**k, you’re so w*t.” He removes his hand only to pull the shorts all the way down while I grapple with the buckle on his khakis.

“Need you.” I ‘m so desperate I’m incapable of full sentences. “Inside. Now.”

“Yes, yes. I know.”

Somehow we migrate backwards until the curved metal of Shiloh’s bed frame is p**ssing into my back. c**k out, Hadrian lifts my left th**h and hitches it against his hip. His other hand finds my throat, and he holds me there as he slides in.

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